dispatches from the new world of work

Urgent Reading!

NPR was kind enough in late 1999 to name In Search of Excellence one of the Top 3 business books of the century then drawing to a close. One of the others was Dale Carnegie's How to Win Friends and Influence People. I'm loath to admit it, but to this day I haven't read it. But, courtesy Amazon.com, it's on the way to Vermont as I write.

The trigger was coming across the following Carnegie quote: "You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you."

"Obvious." Profound. Enduring. In practical terms, "a/the key factor to success"—in any endeavor. And ...

And ... ignored in 99 cases of 100, at least by most men. I want to read more! A lot more! Now! (And then perhaps use it as my Desktop background.)

Running into Carnegie's gem brought to mind another profound winner from Harvard professor Sara Lawrence-Lightfoot, in her book Respect: "It was much later that I realized Dad's secret. He gained respect by giving it. He talked and listened to the fourth-grade kids in Spring Valley who shined shoes the same way he talked and listened to a bishop or a college president. He was seriously interested in who you were and what you had to say."

I'll finally be reading Carnegie by the time you read this. I suggest that you do the same—urgently. We all need this ... all the time.

(NB: How to Win ... was ranked #88 on Amazon yesterday. That's many a rung above In Search of Excellence!)

(NB: All this recalls a little story I once heard. Excuse me for butchering it, but it goes something like this: Following a formal dinner party in which the famous Lady X had been seated between the equally famous Lord Y and Sir Z, she was heard to say, "By the end of the meal, Lord Y had made me aware of just how important he is. But Sir Z had made me understand how important I was." Or some such. You get the drift, eh?)

(Attached you'll find a brief Special Presentation, "Dale Carnegie," that includes the PPT slides associated with this Post.)

Tom Peters posted this on 09/25/06.

Comments

Passionate humility and interest in other people have always stood out in the few exceptional leaders and role models I have met. There is nothing more irritating or arrogant than promotion of 'self.'

Posted by Trevor Gay at September 25, 2006 10:04 AM

I am a 2004 Dale Carnegie graduate and here's my review of the 12 week course:

1. Simply a MUST for every leader and aspiring leader.
2. Changed my life. DRAMATICALLY.

Carnegie's "How To Win Friends..." book was part of the course, but so was "How to Stop Worrying and Start Living," which had a profound effect on me. Read this one next, Tom.

Posted by Mike Gardner at September 25, 2006 11:54 AM

Tom's book and DC's are two of the top three business books... What book is the third one?

Posted by Gabriel Salcido at September 25, 2006 1:30 PM

I love Dale Carnegie's book. He absolutely knows what he's talking about and his advice can help us make a better world for everyone. Just a note that he sometimes writes as if something about human nature, which he knows so well, is regrettable (like our need for praise, for example). I think he had everything right except the regret. Otherwise, it's perfect!

Posted by Marianne Powers at September 25, 2006 11:43 PM

I'm really keen to know what the other book in the Top 3 is. Anyone know? For me it'd be Bossidy & Charan's "Execution" but I'm guessing they'll have gone with something by Peter Drucker.

Posted by Mark JF at September 26, 2006 4:38 AM

My favorite DC quote: "So, if you want people to like you, Rule 2 is: SMILE."

Posted by Mike L at September 26, 2006 6:47 AM

Mark: FREDERICK WINSLOW TAYLOR, "THE PRINCIPLES OF SCIENTIFIC MANAGEMENT." Among other things, Taylor used to speak to crowds of thousands! Taylor must be viewed in context. His "time and motion studies" are usually seen as de-humanizing. Paradoxically his intent was the opposite. By creating "the one best way" to do things he was, as he saw it, turning responsibility over to the worker to run his own show (albeit according to FT's rules); hence, he was diminishing the power of the often capricious, sadistic, dictatorial "crew bosses."

(I think a lot of people were surprised Drucker wasn't on the list. Frankly, I was shocked that "Search" was given the honor.)

Posted by tom peters at September 26, 2006 6:55 AM

Thanks for the update.

Posted by Mark JF at September 26, 2006 7:09 AM

Tom wrote: "Excuse me for butchering it, but it goes something like this: Following a formal dinner party in which the famous Lady X had been seated between the equally famous Lord Y and Sir Z, she was heard to say, "By the end of the meal, Lord Y had made me aware of just how important he is. But Sir Z had made me understand how important I was." Or some such. You get the drift, eh?)...

Just to fill in the x, y, z's on that one...It's the great old story about the difference between Disraeli and Gladstone (Conservative and Liberal Prime Ministers respectively under Queen Victoria). Talking to Gladstone you came away thinking he was the most intelligent person in the world, whereas after talking to Disraeli you came away feeling you were. Sorry for being pernickety, but I'm a Brit and a history graduate.

Oh and Dale Carnegie's How To Win FriendsvAnd Influence People is seventy years old today, according to the BBC this morning. Wow! I'm off to amazon.co.uk to buy it...

Posted by Phil Dourado at September 26, 2006 2:19 PM

Phil, thank you!! I feel like an idiot. At one point I made a rather thorough study of the amazing Dizzy. It began because a British CEO I was working with was a Disraeli fanatic--and created his approach to professional life in the image of Disraeli. I wanted to decipher the CEOs secret code--and then I very much got caught up in my studies, long after the CEO was out of my life. (But I forgot the story's origons.) (As I recal there's a superb BBC Disraeli series.)

Posted by tom peters at September 27, 2006 4:36 PM

I am an expat American teaching graduating seniors (English majors) at Shanghai Jiao Tong University (abbreviated SJTU) writing. What kind of writing? Resumes and cover letters! Trust me, the pressure here for getting a job, especially with a foreign company, is as intense as anywhere in the world.

Here English majors usually have backgrounds in either engineering or business since fluency in English is a highly coveted skill necessary to obtain a high-paying job with a foreign company.

Dale Carnegie is at the top of the list of books I recommend they read so that should an interviewer ask what books they have read to prepare for a business career, they are prepared. Should they ask what they learned from the book they will usually end up saying something such as meeting the esteem needs of an individual human being is the simplest, most direct way to elicit that person's cooperation.

Though the examples DC cites are ancient, the insights are timeless.

Posted by Timothy Mund at September 28, 2006 7:09 AM