Sunday Edition
As you'll see, Tom takes exception to the practice of indifference. We decided to pull his comment to Darci's earlier post titled "Passion or Indifference ... You Choose" and put it on the front page. The following is Tom's comment:
"The reasonable man adapts himself to the world. The unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends upon the unreasonable man."—George Bernard Shaw, Man and Superman: The Revolutionists' HandbookI never did buy Bob Sutton's "be realistic" act. Now I see exactly why.
Of course "Life's a bitch and then you die." But last week I reported on two experiences that make a mockery of Sutton's "Great God of Endured Indifference" routine. AGAINST ALLLLL ODDDDs, and after 72 years (1848-1920) of brutal & demeaning struggle, women won the right to vote. And at Johns Hopkins' Bloomberg School of Public Health I bathed in the stories of alum who ... AGAINST ALL ODDS ... AND MOCKING "REASONABLE" EXPECTATIONS ... AND BELITTLED BY PYGMYS ... had saved millions of theretofore un-cared-about lives. Muhammad Yunus won a Nobel Peace Prize for his microlending miracles—powered by women in a strict Muslim (Bangladesh) society.
Get the hell out of an "impossible" situation? Sometimes it's the only answer. (Been there, done that—McKinsey, circa 1981.) "Practice indifference"? Bullshit. Bullshit. And ... BULLSHIT. Speaking as an about-to-be-65-year-old: LIFE IS TOO BLOODY SHORT TO SPEND ONE DAMN MOMENT OF INDIFFERENCE!!!! (And you'd better believe I've worked for my full share of certified nincompoops.)
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What we're talking about
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Comments
OMG!!!
RIGHT ON Tom Peters!!!!!
Whew! Right on....!
Posted by Doug Mitchell at April 9, 2007 6:21 PM
Tom; there is time and space for considered indifference before action and even as a 65 year old (impending) and yes understanding fully the brevity of life, reflect and act or repent at leisure! Its the amount of time you spend on it that matter and I'd agree the shorter the better but to be as prescriptive as none? not sure I'd agree.
Posted by patrick at April 10, 2007 5:36 AM
Patrick, I appreciate the comment, and respectfully disagree.
Posted by tom peters at April 10, 2007 5:49 AM
Indifference to me is an outward sign of surrender. It is a coping measure that might give us a little "breathing room" while we regroup, and get the energy for another charge. I know too many people that feel they need to put up with the bs around them because they need to feed their family, and just don't see any options. "this too shall pass" was a mantra I heard often in my corporate life. I try my damndest not to judge those that choose indifference, and actually see some nobility in their sacrifice to keep food on the family's table. And it is not just at the factory floor level I see this. I must admit, even in my business, I have taken on assignments that I wasn't passionate about, but needed the cash flow to keep afloat. To escape indifference, I think one needs to accept you will leave safe (but incredibly boring) waters and run the risk of failure. It is an individual choice that involves a great deal of courage. But not making that choice may lead to a lifetime of regret. Tough stuff
Posted by Mike Neiss at April 10, 2007 8:31 AM
As a close-to-46-but-clinging-to 45 year old woman, I think you nailed it. I fight it as a consultant -- "Change is too hard. We will do that when (insert excuse). " I fight it as a mom -- "Mom, it doesn't matter how hard I work she doesn't like me, so what's the point in caring?" I fight it as a grown-up who knows better -- "Fine. I am too tired to fight for/against/toward it (whatever 'it' might be)." Indifference is a horrible, insidious disease that can destroy. Success is about moving. I don't think indifference is the same as taking a "thinking moment" before engaging. Indifference is not caring -- period.
Posted by LaVonn Schlegel at April 10, 2007 9:47 AM
In general, I agree with Tom that life is too short to waste it on indifference. But Mike brings up a good point: some people's passion in life is NOT their career. I know a number of single mothers who are devoted to their children and get no help from their exes. If your passion is your family, you'll do whatever it takes to make sure that your kids are fed, dressed, housed, and educated. And if that means that you can't afford to quit your soul-deadening job, well, that's just the price you pay to achieve your REAL goal.
Coming from a family who operated by this ethic, I'd argue that a parent who refuses to quit a soul-deadening job may be heroic -- but he/she is a lousy role model, and probably a less effective parent than one who's passionate about what he/she does all day. But I can't judge someone who's made the choice to suck it up for their family's sake.
Posted by Paula at April 11, 2007 5:11 PM
Amen Paula. It is about choices, and recognizing that some have more than others...
Posted by Mike Neiss at April 11, 2007 7:40 PM
As someone who just left a soul-deadening job for a (hopefully) more engaging opportunity, I have to say that I agree with both Tom and Mike. To choose indifference for the long-term is to give up a big piece of your potential - and should be avoided, even though it's comfortable.
On the other hand, my experience was that I needed to adopt an indifferent stance in order to regroup and gain the energy needed to make the change... and I certainly didn't have the energy to fight the fight to change the circumstance I was in. Luckily, I had other options.
As I prepared to make the transition, I followed with interest the "servant leadership" discussion, and I'm convinced that organizations will only ever get the best out of people when they realize that the organization owes as much (or more) to its members... in whose hands the real success or failure of the organization is held.
Posted by Andrew at April 13, 2007 8:01 AM
I'm with Tom! In fact I wrote a blog entry on what a passionate response the subject of indifference elicited!
One quote from my entry ... "Wouldn’t you love to be 65 years old and still have that kind of passion?"
http://eagleceonews.blogspot.com/2007/04/indifference-catalyst-for-passion.html
Posted by Kevin Dee at April 16, 2007 3:25 PM
Tom, you really ought to read my book before you get so excited. My main advice is to get out when things are bad as you did -- but not everyone can do it right now. But as the other readers say, I am 12 years from 65, I only hope I am as passionate as you are when I reach 65.
Bob
Posted by Bob Sutton at April 21, 2007 8:10 PM
Perhaps 'choosing the right battle to fight' would be a good middle ground to take. Maintaining your principles, staying engaged and making a difference while not stepping on EVERYone's toes all the time. If you are indifferent on too many levels and too many focus points in your occupation.....LEAVE NOW! You must focus on the top priorities in which to engage your 'inner rebel'.
Posted by Dave at April 23, 2007 3:22 PM
I think you are unfairly bashing Sutton. It's ironic, too, because you are touting Penelope Trunk, who gives horrible, made up, unsound advice about 60 percent of the time. (I got to your page through a google search of "Penelope Trunk" and "bullshit." She is increasingly drawing low reviews on Yahoo for her silly stuff.)
Sutton recommends indifference until you can get into a better situation. I have many smart, creative, and energetic friends--indifference is a strategy that many had to use.
The examples you cite (of non indifference) are wonderful--but they are not comparable to dealing with an asshole boss. The circumstances of the problem and how the change, or solution, came about are much different from those of an employee in corporate America.
I honestly have to wonder if you have lost touch with being a middle manager if you criticize Sutton for his lifesaving advice.
Posted by Chicago woman at August 13, 2007 1:24 AM