Superstar psychologist Martin Seligman is most recently author of Flourish. Among other things, he reports on the ubiquitous U.S. Army training program he developed and helped implement—"Master Resilience Training." As I progressed through this captivating book, I came across the following hypothetical exchange, meant, obviously, for part of the training:
Private Johnson tells Private Gonzales: "Hey my wife called and told me she got a great job on post."
Active constructive response: "That's great. What's the new job? When does she start? What did she say about how she got it and why she deserved it?"
Passive constructive: "That's nice."
Passive destructive: "I got a funny email from my son. Listen to this ..."
Active destructive: "So who's going to be looking after your son? I wouldn't trust a babysitter. There are so many horror stories you hear about babysitters abusing kids."
I shall offer no commentary—but if this little vignette does not trigger a blockbuster bout of introspection, solo or with spouse or colleagues, and especially for males, I don't know what the hell would.
(I, for one, will not look at the world quite the same way I did before happening upon this.)
Before blogging became all the rage, Tom was posting book reviews and Observations (essentially early blog posts) to this site. You can find the archives below.
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